It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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