this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
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small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
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