Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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