I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
