so that wasnt chicken after all
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I currently don't understand fingers.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
