I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I love you.
Bad choice
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize
