State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Couch. On fire.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
