I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
