i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
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