I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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