Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
