Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Randomize
