Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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