idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
