So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
