Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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