I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Randomize