OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Randomize
