Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out

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  (303): oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out http://tfl.nu/89b7
  Replies (16) Good night (734) Bad night (3548)
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  (805): View more from California

  singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful

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  (805): singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful http://tfl.nu/6f81
  Replies (14) Good night (1136) Bad night (1861)
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  (818): View more from California

  got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night

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  (818): got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night http://tfl.nu/zxc1
  Replies (9) Good night (5178) Bad night (953)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.

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  (828): my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is. http://tfl.nu/zedm
  Replies (14) Good night (5072) Bad night (755)
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  (863): View more from Florida

  In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us

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  (863): In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us http://tfl.nu/7cnb
  Replies (4) Good night (2319) Bad night (966)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  That bitch ruined vodka saturday

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  (651): That bitch ruined vodka saturday http://tfl.nu/2db3
  Replies (6) Good night (667) Bad night (1836)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.

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  (717): It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me. http://tfl.nu/ym25
  Replies (9) Good night (886) Bad night (1205)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?

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  (804): I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT? http://tfl.nu/e21q
  Replies (9) Good night (1873) Bad night (814)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.

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  (937): If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true. http://tfl.nu/q4xc
  Replies (12) Good night (701) Bad night (1048)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.

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  (313): When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand. http://tfl.nu/rx8e
  Replies (13) Good night (833) Bad night (1816)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.

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  (410): Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea. http://tfl.nu/1cgp
  Replies (4) Good night (664) Bad night (600)
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  (408): View more from California

  MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE

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  (408): MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE http://tfl.nu/oud3
  Replies (2) Good night (596) Bad night (301)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much

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  (610): I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much http://tfl.nu/u53w
  Replies (2) Good night (318) Bad night (301)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.

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  (503): I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him. http://tfl.nu/nxot
  Replies (3) Good night (618) Bad night (220)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  He keeps bees of course he's weird

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  (248): He keeps bees of course he's weird http://tfl.nu/iaag
  Replies (6) Good night (440) Bad night (265)

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