love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
Randomize
