I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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