I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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