Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
