I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
And then he peed in my hair
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