we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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