I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
