i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Floor bacon is actually really good
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Randomize
