Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
