It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I need water and some morals
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
