It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Randomize
