as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
