so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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