Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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