New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Randomize
