You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Randomize
