even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I wear drunk well.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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