Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
