He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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