Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Randomize
