Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Randomize
