Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
