R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
