he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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