all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
