I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize