So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
