Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
