He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize
