my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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