we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
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