): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
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