seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
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