This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
