so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I want to be your penis for a week.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.